So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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