If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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