Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
