Me too!
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
