so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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