Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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