sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Randomize
