We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
