She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
