so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
