Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Randomize
