Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
