I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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