so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
