I'd wear matching sweaters with you
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
