after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
