it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Hello my rib-scented angel!
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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