she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
