Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
