She went from zero to smokin in five shots
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
