Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
