Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
