he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
