i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
