we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
