He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
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