Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize