We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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