Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize