who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
