yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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