I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
