Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize