...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
