I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize