Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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