i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
