I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
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