Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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