Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
