i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
