Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
