It's just like the Real World with babies
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
