I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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