There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize