it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
it's like heaven, but drunker
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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