Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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