Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
