love makes seman taste better
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
