Don't you send me to vm
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
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